(no subject)

[lykanthropoi]

I've almost finished my Bristol registration, the issue of tuition fees (and other money) has been dealt with. It's probably just a few bouts of last-minute panic that has gripped me and is not letting me finish the registration details. There are a few good reasons for choosing Bristol and English Literature (another weird issue since my subconscious keeps coming back to the offer from Sheffield. What the hell?).

Maybe one of my greatest reasons for studying would be that I don't feel I've finished with it. There are still so many things I want to know and learn about. Seriously, if someone were to offer me a scholarship for a program at a good University or enough money to travel the world as often as I wanted for the rest of my life it would be a tight call. I was randomly browsing through some US college programs, and oh my god. I know, I'm a nerd, and a not-so-clever nerd at that, a scholarship would be wasted on me. But I want to continue learning for the rest of my life. Maybe that's what's driving me into teaching; the enviroment of continuous education, of being in a space where people's cognitive maps are always changing. I remember the way my jaw dropped when Joel told me about the United World Colleges. Thinking of my struggles in highschool- simply wanting to have an English class where the teacher would not complain about his life for half the lesson, or a Biology class with a teacher who showed up- to be in an enviroment where people thought it cool to learn! Sigh. 

As I finished my studies in Maastricht I stumbled across many interesting ideas that had been with me for a while, but I had chosen to not look at more closely. With my sudden ambition to study English and become a teacher, I felt stronger, in my purpose in life and therebye as a person in general. I was able to look further than my own narrow study, and discovered so many interesting things. Social sciences, for example, the social ideas behind artefacts and culture. International Development- mostly through Joel- and what's wrong with it. Why donations don't work. Education, interdisciplinarity and rethinking ways people learn and educational instituitions work... If I could do my degree all over again, it would be Engish Literature and Drama in the UK. If I could do any degree in the world it would be a degree at a liberal arts college in the US. Maybe Earlham...

Yeah. So English Literature. I like it, because to me it provides a link among different disciplines. Purely psychologically speaking, by reading a book you gain insight into another person's life and feelings. You are suddenly immersed in a culture and gain insight into a perspective you would have never crossed otherwise. You learn. History and political issues can gain new meanings. And... the nerd in me can appreciate some writing and words as being beautiful. 

I've gotten very good at listening to my gut-feelings when making decisions. The trouble is that I don't have a definite gut-wrenching feeling about going to Bristol at all. Maybe this is good, I also don't have a very strong feeling about not going. 

Another good reason for going for it- what else would I do next year?

Gah. Life decisions. And the demon inside me smirks and says: Oh, Alice! It's all part of learning, and you like to learn, don't you?

Comments

[potterwitch.livejournal.com]

I hope I can do a Masters degree at some point; I've decided that I need to think about doing one when I'm 26 at the latest, because it wouldn't be much fun to be older than 28 or so at uni, I think. I feel like uni is the best place to be in the world when you're still young, and haven't settled into just seeing the same people and doing the same things over and over again... I miss it already, so badly. Good on you for keeping at it :^) When are you moving down there? Time for a stop-over in London? We can meet up with Izzy and maybe Han!